I've been to two Emerging Churches today.....just to show the diversity of "the Emergent Church," let me tell you about where I went.
The first, "Pause." A subsection, community effort of my home mega-church. Its an attempt to fill the gap in ministry between high school seniors and married couples/young couples with children. Whether this qualifies as an "Emergent" community or not....well if I've learned much of anything about being Emergent, its just that there is no definition and beyond that, the people/groups who would fit the definition refuse the definition profusely.....funny how that works.
Well Pause is a service that takes place in the same room as the weekly youth service--its a gym, turned into an all-black room with a stage, couches, a band, tons of bohemian candles.....basically, if you pick up the book "the Emerging Church," this service models the back of the book, exactly. Creepy. Haha, well all in all, its a very nice service. Great band, normally a very 20s something-oriented sermon. Both communion and offering can take place on your own time.....during the ending song "set" you can visit both the "commune" station where you give yourself communion......or the "contribute" section where there is a box for offering (someone put in a snickers bar today....), not to mention the "connect" section that includes a place to pray and write down prayer requests.
While this whole thing seems so close to form, it is done fairly well. If only there were the people-resources to keep it afloat. Southlake Texas is just not a hot spot for the 20-30 crowd, no matter what you do. Sad. In the spirit of community; however, instead of just the passing of the peace/hand shaking session, they do encourage "real conversation" which could last as long as 4-5 minutes. Actually have to get to know someone--community, a strong part of this whole postmodern church thing.
Trial #2
Searching off the "Emerging Church" directory website, I found "Mars Hill," named independently but still somewhat remaining connected to Rob Bell's Emergent Church. Funny enough, I'd already interviewed the pastors at their home.....part of my Christian Monastics series. This group, qualifiying for "true Emergent status" looks very different from Pause.
There was little attempt to appear cool---the black room, bohemian look, couches and dimmed light of Pause was replaced by a house--where we gathered in the living room. I ran late, getting there at 5:20, 20 minutes late.....to only find out that the "service" began at 6:30pm. Before then, we stood around and talked, I had a couple of great talks about the Emerging church, Evangelism, and my research. Very friendly people. All in all, about 20 people came.
Today's service was about "Stewardship." Apparently last week they talked about stewarding, giving in terms of relationships, money, "words" and service. This was much more fluid and hippiesque in nature than anything I'd really ever seen. However, seeing the direction of my own life lately, I easily fit in and played along.
The pastor talked about how the time before we started served as a time to steward our relationships with others in the community---and how afterwards we weren't going to close in prayer for the sake that our stewarding would not end, whoa. Cool but just very different.
Instead of a formal teaching time, he had asked everyone in the community to go back and spend the week considering what God would have them bring back this next week. One guy had us speak out the names of the trinity (God, Jesus, Holy Spirit) in prayer, one guy had a psalm to read, and a woman talked about aching for the body of Christ. It felt much like my other almost-Emerging community in Newport news where we did a Quaker like exercise one time.
Results, I don't know about the whole House Church thing. People surely have a greater chance of being really connected, loved, and cared for, really experiencing community. However, there is some difficulty in the 1st time. I could handle it, being fairly friendly and really familiar with religious settings.....however, a true seeker, would they feel welcome? Is church the place for the "seeker" to come? Or would they be invited? Is it bad to place a greater burden on the believer to have to personally invite the seeker to come? hmmm....
comment!
Sunday, May 28, 2006
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Christian Hippies #2
Today I drove about an hour east of my home to Garland, Texas to visit my second "monastic community."
Many differences came out of this community, most that I would say are evidence of adapation to the Texas environment. Beyond that, however, they are a younger group, not so much by age as much by vocation. They had only begun living in community--and nominally calling themselves an abbey 8 months ago.
They mentioned how their neighbors were not very friendly(indicative of the middle class, mobile North Texan)....so the outreach bit, well they're waiting until they move to a larger home in a slightly "rougher" section of town. Interestingly, their strong interests in both the arts scene and beer tasting (mentioned several monastic communities that made wine/beer....how would the CC's respond to that one?), has provided for most of their ministry.
I did not really identify as much with the background of these folks. The married couple I spoke with, one had grown up in community in some part, offspring of true hippie parents (the whole deal) and the other a child of a divorced couple. At the other communities, the disatisfaction with "boring" middle class, white life seemed to fuel alot of common interests and stories. However, their background seemed to create a way of understanding with their families that was absent in the other communities and people I've spoken with.
I wonder about this idea of "community." Does it draw the broken? Today we spoke about how it drew people who were often "easy going" in nature, or at least those were the people that survived living in community (aka living with non related people in very close quarters, both physically, emotionally, and spiritually). But there was also this expressed element that those living in community somehow "needed" each other, as though they could not make it on their own.
Are we all in need of others? Are those living in community just the only ones to recognize it? Drawing the broken, what kind of "sin" or hurt are we talking about....must it be overt, the public/"big time" sins we all talk about....or what about the relational sin? the social sin? Sometimes we talk about the longer we have a relationship with God, counterintuitively, we become more and more dependent on him. Maybe this whole community thing is like that too, we become increasingly dependent on one another, in a good way....we hope, the more we are willing to open up to one another.
The achievement-minded, individualistic person in me questions whether I could really "die to myself" enough to join something like this. Its so much more than an outreach program. Its a very different lifestyle behind closed doors.
Many differences came out of this community, most that I would say are evidence of adapation to the Texas environment. Beyond that, however, they are a younger group, not so much by age as much by vocation. They had only begun living in community--and nominally calling themselves an abbey 8 months ago.
They mentioned how their neighbors were not very friendly(indicative of the middle class, mobile North Texan)....so the outreach bit, well they're waiting until they move to a larger home in a slightly "rougher" section of town. Interestingly, their strong interests in both the arts scene and beer tasting (mentioned several monastic communities that made wine/beer....how would the CC's respond to that one?), has provided for most of their ministry.
I did not really identify as much with the background of these folks. The married couple I spoke with, one had grown up in community in some part, offspring of true hippie parents (the whole deal) and the other a child of a divorced couple. At the other communities, the disatisfaction with "boring" middle class, white life seemed to fuel alot of common interests and stories. However, their background seemed to create a way of understanding with their families that was absent in the other communities and people I've spoken with.
I wonder about this idea of "community." Does it draw the broken? Today we spoke about how it drew people who were often "easy going" in nature, or at least those were the people that survived living in community (aka living with non related people in very close quarters, both physically, emotionally, and spiritually). But there was also this expressed element that those living in community somehow "needed" each other, as though they could not make it on their own.
Are we all in need of others? Are those living in community just the only ones to recognize it? Drawing the broken, what kind of "sin" or hurt are we talking about....must it be overt, the public/"big time" sins we all talk about....or what about the relational sin? the social sin? Sometimes we talk about the longer we have a relationship with God, counterintuitively, we become more and more dependent on him. Maybe this whole community thing is like that too, we become increasingly dependent on one another, in a good way....we hope, the more we are willing to open up to one another.
The achievement-minded, individualistic person in me questions whether I could really "die to myself" enough to join something like this. Its so much more than an outreach program. Its a very different lifestyle behind closed doors.
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
The Dentist
It's funny to me how everything that consitutes being kind, politically powerful, and just Southern in Southlake, Texas is synonomous with nominal Christianity.
I love my dentist. They are the nicest people, all of them. Most everyone working there has been there for the 11 years I've gone there. The dentist and his main secretary are the uncles of one of my friends from high school...and fancy that, they're related to the family who is the mayor. Oh, Southlake politics. The family has a major road named after them.
Again the blurring of the lines of religion, though. For instance, my mayor, barely involved in my church, sang at my church at the post-September 11th service held to comfort people and pray for others. I remember feeling somewhat troubled by this. I'm not sure if I had some idea that religion and politics shouldn't mix....or what it was. Its funny though, pretty much any politician looking to get elected in this town must very publically (in flyers sent in the mail normally) announce their church membership, ususally to our church or the other mega church.
But back to the dentist. The soft-rock Christian station plays in the background. I wish they'd play the more alternative Christian station...but that might mess up their precision with their instruments. Made me think about what brands of music are "unoffensive".....well looking for a lack of curse words, hmmm instrumental? Christian? oldies? But this is Texas, so Christian music it is. Probably anywhere else in the country and Christian music might be offensive.
I wonder if they only hire Christian people here? Do they pray in the morning? hmmm the blurring of the sacred and profane......
I love my dentist. They are the nicest people, all of them. Most everyone working there has been there for the 11 years I've gone there. The dentist and his main secretary are the uncles of one of my friends from high school...and fancy that, they're related to the family who is the mayor. Oh, Southlake politics. The family has a major road named after them.
Again the blurring of the lines of religion, though. For instance, my mayor, barely involved in my church, sang at my church at the post-September 11th service held to comfort people and pray for others. I remember feeling somewhat troubled by this. I'm not sure if I had some idea that religion and politics shouldn't mix....or what it was. Its funny though, pretty much any politician looking to get elected in this town must very publically (in flyers sent in the mail normally) announce their church membership, ususally to our church or the other mega church.
But back to the dentist. The soft-rock Christian station plays in the background. I wish they'd play the more alternative Christian station...but that might mess up their precision with their instruments. Made me think about what brands of music are "unoffensive".....well looking for a lack of curse words, hmmm instrumental? Christian? oldies? But this is Texas, so Christian music it is. Probably anywhere else in the country and Christian music might be offensive.
I wonder if they only hire Christian people here? Do they pray in the morning? hmmm the blurring of the sacred and profane......
Monday, May 22, 2006
Settling into Summer
Going from my normal life speed, which is generally crazy busy to summer mode, or home mode is always difficult. First I feel like I'm lonely, maybe I need to call friends or find someone to hang out with.
This generally leads to me doing somewhat odd stuff like deciding that I will go alone to some sort of church event. Yesterday it was the May single's mixer at church, a dinner before some sort of concert at church. My mom had actually signed me up. Well, thinking this would be a place to at least hang out with some of the church staff, seeing as no one really from the college-age group does anything, I sucked it up and went. No one else came. I ate with the band.
So then after a slightly awkward social encounter, I usually retreat. During this time period I'm too shy to call anyone to do anything. Yea, I'm still somewhat bored or lonely...but by this point, I'd rather watch movies (which I generally can't sit through) or read rather than take the chance to call anyone. Not to mention I hate talking on the phone.
So here I sit in that weird balancing state, wanting to be social or busy or something.....but feeling the tug to sit out in the backyard by the pool or workout or just watch old bad tv. Summer breeds a strange brand of laziness.....or maybe just anxiety.
Regardless, I've really done quite a bit these past few days. Been to 2 concerts already, one in the biggest honkey-tonk cowboy bar I've been to in awhile. (WM, think Green Leafe size times 15 or 20). Got to check out the 25-30s singles scene.....I'm not sure if that will ever be my scene. Not sure if I can ever let myself dance like that......but someday surely that'll be what I do with friends, then it might be fun.
Had another brush with the 20s singles last night at church. Attempted a pre-concert dinner for the singles "may mixer," only to find out no one but me had signed up (this was a mixed blessing, thank God, no awkward conversations, realizing I was very different than most post-divorce 35-45 age "singles" at our church......what can I say? my mom signed me up). I hope at this age I can be identified my more than just my lack of marital status.
Other than that, joined a close-by gym for the month and had a nice lunch date with my mom to cheesecake factory today....getting used to being home.
This generally leads to me doing somewhat odd stuff like deciding that I will go alone to some sort of church event. Yesterday it was the May single's mixer at church, a dinner before some sort of concert at church. My mom had actually signed me up. Well, thinking this would be a place to at least hang out with some of the church staff, seeing as no one really from the college-age group does anything, I sucked it up and went. No one else came. I ate with the band.
So then after a slightly awkward social encounter, I usually retreat. During this time period I'm too shy to call anyone to do anything. Yea, I'm still somewhat bored or lonely...but by this point, I'd rather watch movies (which I generally can't sit through) or read rather than take the chance to call anyone. Not to mention I hate talking on the phone.
So here I sit in that weird balancing state, wanting to be social or busy or something.....but feeling the tug to sit out in the backyard by the pool or workout or just watch old bad tv. Summer breeds a strange brand of laziness.....or maybe just anxiety.
Regardless, I've really done quite a bit these past few days. Been to 2 concerts already, one in the biggest honkey-tonk cowboy bar I've been to in awhile. (WM, think Green Leafe size times 15 or 20). Got to check out the 25-30s singles scene.....I'm not sure if that will ever be my scene. Not sure if I can ever let myself dance like that......but someday surely that'll be what I do with friends, then it might be fun.
Had another brush with the 20s singles last night at church. Attempted a pre-concert dinner for the singles "may mixer," only to find out no one but me had signed up (this was a mixed blessing, thank God, no awkward conversations, realizing I was very different than most post-divorce 35-45 age "singles" at our church......what can I say? my mom signed me up). I hope at this age I can be identified my more than just my lack of marital status.
Other than that, joined a close-by gym for the month and had a nice lunch date with my mom to cheesecake factory today....getting used to being home.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
Home in the Lone Star State!
5/20I love Texas. A world all its own. I struggle so much here though if I’m in nostalgia or heaven. Wow what a different world life is here. It’s nice to be pampered though. I come home and suddenly I am the owner of a new credit card, gym membership….and my parents also gave me about 10 gift certificates (my brother’s Christmas gifts he never bothered to use). But hey, means I get some free trips to American Eagle, Jamba Juice, Chipotle, Starbucks, about 3 movie theaters, and a thrift store. Wow. I’m set.
Our recreated “town square” has opened up another phase since I’ve been home last. Now we’ve got some sort of arbor-like fountain area surrounded by such exciting stores as J Crew, Coach, Barnes and Noble, Cheesecake Factory, Toll House Cookies (huh?), and about 20 others. Classy. Geez, consumerism is going to take me over.
In other good news, the period of freezing at Rockbridge is over. It’s now a pleasant 95-100 degrees everyday which makes for wonderful Texas summer nights at about 80 degrees. And really, I do think that's fairly pleasant. I love Texas. Let me say that again. I love Texas.
Our recreated “town square” has opened up another phase since I’ve been home last. Now we’ve got some sort of arbor-like fountain area surrounded by such exciting stores as J Crew, Coach, Barnes and Noble, Cheesecake Factory, Toll House Cookies (huh?), and about 20 others. Classy. Geez, consumerism is going to take me over.
In other good news, the period of freezing at Rockbridge is over. It’s now a pleasant 95-100 degrees everyday which makes for wonderful Texas summer nights at about 80 degrees. And really, I do think that's fairly pleasant. I love Texas. Let me say that again. I love Texas.
A Long Trip Before Home
5/10-5/19
So traveling again. A wonderful night trip around Washington DC and Northern Virginia with Sara. We practically swam to get to a neat coffee shop somewhere around there. I just know I’d been there before with another “native.”
Next came a day shadowing interns at a place I might want to go after I graduate. That was an interesting and long day. It’s amazing how many people in Washington are willing to work for free. I’m not sure I get it yet.
A couple of days with Alex before she goes off the France for the next year. That was great to spend some solid time together and really get a chance to get to know her family even better. We talk for hours. It’s amazing to see who she’s become.
Next I went onto Rockbridge camp with InterVarsity. While this week was not exactly earth-shattering or pivotal, it was wonderful to have a few days to spend with some of my best friends in a relaxed place.
I took this mini-class (like 3-4) days called Kingdom Living. Kind of like discussing what it means to live properly in God’s Kingdom, that one coming on earth. Some of the topical sessions included multiethnicity, sexuality, wealth& justice, and politics. We also did a great study of the sermon on the mount. I am continually impressed with the way Intervarsity handles difficult issues.
So traveling again. A wonderful night trip around Washington DC and Northern Virginia with Sara. We practically swam to get to a neat coffee shop somewhere around there. I just know I’d been there before with another “native.”
Next came a day shadowing interns at a place I might want to go after I graduate. That was an interesting and long day. It’s amazing how many people in Washington are willing to work for free. I’m not sure I get it yet.
A couple of days with Alex before she goes off the France for the next year. That was great to spend some solid time together and really get a chance to get to know her family even better. We talk for hours. It’s amazing to see who she’s become.
Next I went onto Rockbridge camp with InterVarsity. While this week was not exactly earth-shattering or pivotal, it was wonderful to have a few days to spend with some of my best friends in a relaxed place.
I took this mini-class (like 3-4) days called Kingdom Living. Kind of like discussing what it means to live properly in God’s Kingdom, that one coming on earth. Some of the topical sessions included multiethnicity, sexuality, wealth& justice, and politics. We also did a great study of the sermon on the mount. I am continually impressed with the way Intervarsity handles difficult issues.
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Visiting Christian Hippies #1
5/9
Wow, has it been an intense 48 hours. The people of this community. Well at first I didn’t think they would like me, I was too naïve, or too much of a girl at a rock concert for her favorite band; however, being aware, and really deathly afraid of coming off as this girl, I instead tried to play it somewhat cool. However, this is a hard task to do when you are constantly having to ask questions, but for sociological reasons, of course. Well, there are some odd lifestyle points that do stick out to me that I found particularly challenging. For one, the place is always clean. For some reason, the like to keep all the doors to rooms open, meaning the beds must be more than made. This could be difficult. Doable, though I’m sure. I was relieved to find that it really seemed like everyone showered every day. However, one guy was definitely wearing exactly the same outfit the second day. It was an extraordinary outfit, tunic, and cut out finger gloves and all, but wow! Another interesting point—of those who talk about dating in the house, they are both engaged to either seminary students or people living in similar communities, aren’t these people all of the same breed? A little weird? Do they have any other friends? I wonder if this lifestyle repeals people.
I have had a semi-revelation, well at least for a day. I was going to buy an ipod this summer for this project but convictions I gathered from my time here that I did not really “need” this frivolous item. Besides, trying to be someone to engage with the people around me, is difficult to do with head phones in your head.
Wow, has it been an intense 48 hours. The people of this community. Well at first I didn’t think they would like me, I was too naïve, or too much of a girl at a rock concert for her favorite band; however, being aware, and really deathly afraid of coming off as this girl, I instead tried to play it somewhat cool. However, this is a hard task to do when you are constantly having to ask questions, but for sociological reasons, of course. Well, there are some odd lifestyle points that do stick out to me that I found particularly challenging. For one, the place is always clean. For some reason, the like to keep all the doors to rooms open, meaning the beds must be more than made. This could be difficult. Doable, though I’m sure. I was relieved to find that it really seemed like everyone showered every day. However, one guy was definitely wearing exactly the same outfit the second day. It was an extraordinary outfit, tunic, and cut out finger gloves and all, but wow! Another interesting point—of those who talk about dating in the house, they are both engaged to either seminary students or people living in similar communities, aren’t these people all of the same breed? A little weird? Do they have any other friends? I wonder if this lifestyle repeals people.
I have had a semi-revelation, well at least for a day. I was going to buy an ipod this summer for this project but convictions I gathered from my time here that I did not really “need” this frivolous item. Besides, trying to be someone to engage with the people around me, is difficult to do with head phones in your head.
Bus trip from Williamsburg to Durham
5/7
Riding the bus is a sociological experience as they said today at our quaint, academic major’s brunch. I am struck now by the stark reality of the difference. My experience tells me I should be loving, accepting, and use my knowledge to enact grassroots change. However, again I see that God-love is hard. Today it is scary. I start to wonder if there’s some reason why I’ve never read of a woman’s experience loving “least of these” in these inner city communities. I want to say that as a woman I am some how entitled to feeling scared—and letting that fear disable me somehow seems “ok.” Isn’t a Godly woman sweet and docile?
Today I am struck with fear—fear somehow deeply engrained in me, probably rooted in the original sin or prejudice. I am afraid of the 19 year old white high school drop out who wants to tell me about his difficulties staying out of jail or dealing with his inbred high school teacher. When he says this, he is referencing mixed race—the sociologist, Christian, and human inside of me cringes, then reconsidering the privilege of education, ironically that is supposed to serve to keep me away from the fear that kind of comment is rooted within. I am afraid of the black man around me, especially the man who asks me to borrow my phone. What is this? Who am I? Why am I this way? This fear is disabling. How can I help when I cannot move? Who am I to use this word “help” even? What about when my fear makes me useless?
It’s humbling, I am nothing again.
Riding the bus is a sociological experience as they said today at our quaint, academic major’s brunch. I am struck now by the stark reality of the difference. My experience tells me I should be loving, accepting, and use my knowledge to enact grassroots change. However, again I see that God-love is hard. Today it is scary. I start to wonder if there’s some reason why I’ve never read of a woman’s experience loving “least of these” in these inner city communities. I want to say that as a woman I am some how entitled to feeling scared—and letting that fear disable me somehow seems “ok.” Isn’t a Godly woman sweet and docile?
Today I am struck with fear—fear somehow deeply engrained in me, probably rooted in the original sin or prejudice. I am afraid of the 19 year old white high school drop out who wants to tell me about his difficulties staying out of jail or dealing with his inbred high school teacher. When he says this, he is referencing mixed race—the sociologist, Christian, and human inside of me cringes, then reconsidering the privilege of education, ironically that is supposed to serve to keep me away from the fear that kind of comment is rooted within. I am afraid of the black man around me, especially the man who asks me to borrow my phone. What is this? Who am I? Why am I this way? This fear is disabling. How can I help when I cannot move? Who am I to use this word “help” even? What about when my fear makes me useless?
It’s humbling, I am nothing again.
Friday, May 05, 2006
Genesis
Finally finished with finals....alliteration for you! Well my travels begin officially in two days when I'll be traveling to Durham North Carolina to check out a Christian intentional community. In the meantime, I spent my first weekend of finals in Washington DC where I went to a STAND (Students Taking Action Now Darfur) conference at George Washington University and slept outside just off the mall with Invisible Children's Global Night Commute (a protest/awareness event about child soldiers held captive in Northern Uganda).
I'm trying this blog thing out, at least for the summer....we'll see if I can stick with it. Check it out!
I'm trying this blog thing out, at least for the summer....we'll see if I can stick with it. Check it out!
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