Two way Street?

The other day I let a student buy me coffee.

This isn't how these things are supposed to go--as part of my fundraising for InterVarsity, I have an expense account which I can use to take students out for coffee, lunch, buy snacks for our evening meetings, etc. Essentially, I'm supposed to be giving towards them in many ways--food, time, my love, thoughts and care.

But when she offered--I accepted. Why? Because I think I'm needing to learn some lessons about reciprocity, especially in relationships where I often want to just be the giver, rather than the receiver.

This applies to my life on many levels. On campus, I'm struggling a lot with finding that line of vulnerability/friendship/divulgance with students I didn't ever have a peer relationship with--at a school unfamiliar to me. How much do I share with them? How can I expect them to share with me when I won't talk about myself? Of course, those who know me, know I'm probably more likely to fall into saying too much rather than too little on this front.
But maybe I'm not being as open as I could be on campus, open to being blessed by students and letting them do for me.

However, when I was doing my honors thesis research I think God did a lot of work on me about receiving gifts from others. While I expected to go and listen, research and learn from each community--I never expected to be treated so well, cared for and given hospitality to the extent i was. I learned to humbly allow others to serve me much more than I had before.

But it also applies in my neighborhood. When I sit back and take a hard look at myself and my motivations. I see that often I am much more comfortable with a charity relationship with those in poverty. I give, they receive, we understand our roles and everyone goes home relatively unchanged. However, I think I'm missing something there. Before I can hope to sincerly give to others around me, especially where i live where racial and economic divisions are pronounced--I need to become familiar with a friendship, two-way relationship with those around me. What that would look like? I'm not quite sure yet. But probably rather than dolling out money or volunteer hours--it would mean asking to borrow things from neighbors, telling them my stories. Essentially the way that relatonships naturally develop.....or something like that.